Early In The Morning 6:20 PM

3am. The phone rings. I reach out. Answer it. Dial tone. I'm up. Get dressed. Brush teeth. Gel hair. The phone rings. Again. I reach out. Answer it. Jody is on her way. Grab my keys. Head out the door. Foggy. Streets deserted. 20 minutes go by. 80 blocks go by. 4 cars go by. She's waiting. In the lobby. 9 hours go by. 1,000s of people go by. $111.37 more than I had. I leave. Drive home. Nap. Still tired.

Viewing Habits 7:51 PM

Having time on my hands, I have become accustomed to the day time TV schedule on cable. I now find myself watching shows that I never would have given a second glance to. One in particular is Little House on the Prairie. I ran across it while flipping channels one day. Every morning I tune in to see it. Today's episode happened to be about Mary going blind and I found myself on the edge of my seat as her sight failed and wanted to scream as she cried out for Pa. I laugh at myself for this one, I never would have thought I'd be hooked on the saga of the Ingall's family as I was as a child. I need to find a job!

I Got It 7:28 PM

I'm done with moping around. Today brought the one thing I needed to let the past go, embrace the future. Oh yeah, there were actually jobs to apply for online too!

Words To Live By 9:43 PM

Lately I have been searching. Searching for a way to put myself together again. I feel adrift, lost. things unravelled for me back in December, have continued to go haywire since. It seems like everything I am trying to accomplish just falls apart. My mindset is on uprighting myself, getting things in order, back to good. While on the Internet today, I came across a quote from Mother Teresa, which I have read before. It really moved me, carries a powerful message. I will now instill it into myself, my life.

"Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it. Life is bliss, taste it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfill it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it"

Let The Sunshine In 1:29 PM

The day is sunny, warm, have the windows open wide and am enjoying it very much. Tonight I am going to see Hair at the UWM Peck School of the Arts with Char, Tim and Julia. I'm looking forward to it, the performance, the music, and getting to spend some time with friends and family, who bring sunshine into my life.

Just What I Needed . . . 2:51 PM

I was online today applying for a job in web design. The job site sent me to the companies website to fill out a questionnaire about my experience. About half way through a pop up window appeared thanking me for applying, and based on the answers provided, I did not meet the eligibility requirements. I laughed, even though I was disappointed.

In the mail today I received the first unemployment compensation check along with two letters denying me four weeks of unemployment for not following proper procedure when registering. Again I had to laugh, even though I was disappointed by more government bureaucracy.

Then I read my brother Patrick's blog. Again I laughed. And I smiled. And I cried. Somehow he always finds a way to be there for me.

http://dndpat.blogspot.com/2009/04/when-i-need-lift.html

The Standard 6:03 PM

Another day of searching online for a suitable career. I have applied for so many positions now that I do not remember all of them. I'm going to start a log of every job I apply for from this point on. For the amount of jobs I applied for, I have received just a few rejection emails. They are all pretty standard, formal, impersonal, cold. Here is a copy:

Dear Matthew,

Thank you for submitting your resume to [comapny deleted] for consideration.

We are fortunate to have many qualified candidates apply to each of our
positions. We have reviewed the qualifications of each candidate and after
careful consideration, we have determined that the credentials of other
candidates may better fit our needs at this time.

Good luck on your search for employment.

The only nice thing is these companies actually acknowledge that you have expressed interest.

Rain Rain Go Away 7:10 PM

Today has been overcast and the rain makes me sleepy (like I need an excuse to nap the day away). Yesterday was such a nice warm day. I ventured over to Mom and Dad's for lunch, Michael stopped over, we played a game of scrabble, then Pat and Toni came by, then Tim and we all sat around the kitchen table laughing and talking and had a good visit. I read in the evening, went to bed, got up early and headed down to the casino with Mom and Dad, where I ended up winning $100.21 for my efforts. Too bad that only happens once in a while, Ireally need to avoid the casino these days! Came home and napped and read. I blame it all on the dreary day. What'll be my excuse for tomorrow?

The Moon, The Stars, The Symphony 7:38 AM

Last night Tim, Julia, and I went out for dinner at the Carleton Grange, where we all enjoyed a fish fry. We had attempted to go to the South Shore Inn, but their kitchen is closed for renovations. After dinner, we headed over to the Wehr Nature Center, met up with Michael, and were going to go on the Moon Stroll/Astronomy Hike. It was a preregistered event, not show up and participate one so we ventured out on our own nature walk. As it grew darker, we stopped back at the car to get a flashlight and ventured back to the trails. we ended up near a lake sitting on a pier talking when we all noticed the geese were starting to become restless, noisy. They grew louder and louder, we saw geese fighting, flying across the water, it was chaotic. We watched in amazement as it continued on, the geese were definitely battling, their cries echoing, creshendoing, a cacophony of noise. As I listened, it reminded me of music, a song of nature. It was amazing. After a while the geese started settling down, the dance, the song over. We walked back to the car, went to Kopps, then to Barnes and Noble. I really enjoyed the night.

The Leo Dragon 8:32 PM

Everything won't be so easy during these days: despite some valuable awareness, you'll go through moments of stress, disillusions, and conflicts. If your heart is free to be taken, you'll make an encounter of paramount importance during a meeting at your close relatives' house. Your resistance against microbial and viral infections will be reduced; therefore, redouble your precautions and consider, for example, taking a trace-element treatment so as to reinforce the natural defenses of your body. The stars will protect you, and nothing serious can bring you down. Try to be much more tactful so as to improve things. Your cholesterol level could increase; get a blood test made, replace meat with fish more often and butter with vegetable oils. You can count on some valuable friendly support, which will give you the means of carrying out a project that you have so close to your heart.

This is my horoscope for the next month. I'll see how things pan out.

The Phone Won't Stop Ringing 5:14 PM

Today my telephone (landline) has been ringing non-stop. Some of the calls I actually answered, most I've let the answering machine get. Seems that since I have registered at so many job sites, my name has been released to many solicitors, none of which I am interested in dealing with. So much for the no call list. When the phone rings, I look to see who it is, if I don't recognize the name, I don't answer. Unfortunately none have been job offers, prize notifications, or the one person who I want to talk to the most. Oh well, the answering machine is keeping busy.

Leftovers 9:05 PM

I had the second helping of ham, turkey, green beans, stuffing, and sweet potatos from Easter dinner tonight. It was a great meal on Sunday, a great meal last night, and a great meal tonight as well. Sometimes leftovers are better than the actual meal itself. Today was no exception. When a meal is great to start with, tou can;t have bad leftovers. And do I love sweet potatos!

Headache 6:29 PM

Today is rather overcast and rainy. I've had a pounding headache all day, took some excedrin earlier and pretty much napped the afternoon away. I applied for some jobs online, contemplating my next approach in finding a job, and thinking about getting Windows certification to add to the resume. Looking for a job is a headache in itself, given the current economic situation. The search continues . . .

Hoppin' Down The Bunny Trail 12:05 PM

Happy Easter to everybody! Family, friends, readers, enjoy the day! Peter Cottontail wouldn't have it any other way . . .

Seeing Red (Lobster) 5:50 PM

The ad for lobsterfest got me craving. Craving for their garlic cheddar biscuits. So when Julie suggested we meet for lunch, the obvious choice was Red Lobster. I met Julie and Hiro when it opened today, and dined on biscuits, seafood stuffed mushrooms, wood fire grilled chicken, and garlic shrimp skewers. Yum! Then we stopped at Starbucks, grabbed some coffee, and went to her house for the afternoon. Watched Finding Nemo, well, it was on while Hiro entertained me before nap time!

Seeing Red (from laughing at myself) 9:59 PM

So I just got in about 20 minutes ago from sitting in the lobby of the building because I ran out to catch the UPS man and let the door close behind me and didn't have my keys. I wasn't wearing shoes either. Of course no one was around to answer the buzzer and I had to wait until someone cam home. It was a little after 7:00pm when I heard the truck arrive, my buzzer doesn't work, so I had to go downstairs. I missed Survivor, Hell's Kitchen, and Harper's Island, Funny thing is, the same thing happened to me last year. I do like the messenger bag I ordered to carry my lap top in though!

Seeing Red (Tape) 5:19 PM

Yesterday I went to lunch with Christine and one of the topics of discussion was unemployment benefits. I haven't gotten any notification since originally filing, and neither had she, and others let go from the company have been collecting benefits. So I wondered if the Social Security issue was affecting my unemployment somehow. I attempted to access my account online but was directed to call. So this morning I did. After waiting 40 minutes, I finally got a representative. My unemployment claim had been closed due to inactivity!?! I explained that after my initial filing, I have not received any notifications. The rep started explaining to me that I was to follow the online instructions and had failed to do so, thus the claim was closed. I told her I was waiting for further information and didn't realize that I was approved immediately. After being lectured, I had to reapply for unemployment benefits. I am now reregistered and can collect benefits while I am unemployed. I was releived in a way that social security wasn't involved, but frustrated by the process which should be simpler than it is. I realize I do not like dealing with government offices.

Shopping Spree 2:08 PM

Today I went shopping. Shopping for a job. Got dressed in nice pants, shirt, sweater, headed to a Job Fair and went through from table to table. Left my resume with some, chatted with some. Not really into the whole job fair scene, too much chaos and superficiality. The best part of the morning was wearing the shoes I bought a few weeks ago! I stayed for about an hour. Then I went to the grocery store and loaded up on food. Have a nice stocked freezer, refrigerator, and cupboards now. After I got home, I surfed job boards online, applied for a number of jobs posted. Now I've got yet another ANTM marathon showing on TV, a Java Monster open, and about to pick up my latest book.

Lazy Days 10:13 AM

Been doing pretty much of nothing lately. Applying for jobs online, reading, watching TV, listening to music. Got to the book store for a while yesterday, the casino today. Going to settle in for the coming storm, do some laundry and just lounge. Stocked up on Java Monster, Kool-Aid, Chicken Strips, and Mac & Cheese so I'm good for the day or ow long the duration the storm is. Today seems to be a good one to just be lazy.

A Little Pampering 1:33 PM

After

Before

I needed to clean myself up a bit, so when the job interviews start rolling in, I look presentable. I went to Sportcuts and had a haircut, hot towel wrap, and a neck & shoulder massage. I feel Pretty! Damn! Good!

Hairy Situations 5:39 PM

Situation One:

1:00pm today the line for Taco Bell is not moving, stretching through the hallway at UWM, quick decision, let's go to Qdoba on Oakland, order queso burrito, black beans, sour cream, salsa. good, tasty, filling, 3/4 finished, take a forkful, encounter clump of hair, notify indifferent manager, "what do you want me to do with it?", "it's on top not in the food", offer of a burrito to go, I'll pass, thank you, emailed the corporation once I returned home

Situation Two:

9:15pm yesterday knock at the door, neighbor across the hall is standing there dressed in torn shorts, his elbow wrapped in a towel, blood flowing, he fell in the shower, his elbow smashing the ceramic soap dish on the wall, does he need to go to the emergency room, can I check to see just how bad he's cut, the blood won't stop flowing, unwrapped, there's still a shard of ceramic in the wound, tweezers, a quick pull, it's removed, compression, talking in the hallway, the blood stops, the wound isn't bad, more talking, and it's decided no emergency room visit

Situation Three:

9:00am yesterday getting dressed for the day, pull on a sweater, it's got dog hair on it, from an old friend, and it's all in the foreground again, when will it pass, when does it stop, when does the hurting end